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Re: F16 Release announcement draft

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Nice Job, Ben.

One change I would make ... under KDE:

"The new shutdown dialog allows users with multiple operating systems
can select which one to reboot to."

I would reword that a little.  Perhaps something along the lines of

"A new shutdown dialog allows users with multiple operating systems to
select the reboot OS."

although simply replacing "can" with "to" would get 99% of the way
there.

--McD

On Mon, 2011-10-24 at 20:34 -0400, Ben Cotton wrote:
> Hey gang,
> 
> I've written up a draft of the release announcement for Fedora 16
> since I volunteered for it in the meeting today. The draft can be
> found at:
> 
> https://fedoraproject.org/wiki/F16_release_announcement
> 
> I did what I could based on the talking points and the feature list.
> If you have any suggestions or edits, please feel free to edit the
> wiki page. I've never written RAs before, and it turns out to be kind
> of fun, so if you'd like to provide some constructive criticism
> on-list, or out-of-band, I'd be glad to hear it!
> 
> 
> Thanks,
> BC
> 
> -- 
> Ben Cotton


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